- Posted on May 11, 2018
- in Blog
Happy Mother's Day from Everlasting Adoptions! Whether you've been blessed to become a mother biologically, through adootion or if you are still waiting for your Mother's Day; you are stronger than you will ever know. No matter what path your journey takes, there are challenges along the way. Make today a day to celebrate you, your perseverance and all the love you have in your heart even if your journey to motherhood is not yet complete.
- Posted on May 9, 2018
- in Blog
The staff and adoptive parents at Everlasting Adoptions want to thank all birth mothers for their incredible acts of love. Our families wouldn’t exist without them. Not a day goes by that we don’t recognize how their greatest sacrifice has brought our families their greatest joy. Our adoptive parents reached out to us to share their experiences and how their birth mothers’ selfless acts of bravery have forever changed their lives.
“We have adopted both of our children through Everlasting Adoptions and both are the biggest blessings of our lives! In February our daughter, Avalyn Elise, was born. Her birth mother, Hayley, has been so amazing through this process. Truly, we have gained a friend in her along the way. She is humble, caring, and so sweet. We had the pleasure of spending time with her 2 weeks before Avalyn "Ava" was born and then spent 11 days with her after she was born. We have seen the emotions that this incredibly selfless sacrifice brings and we could not be more honored and excited that she chose us! We love our birth mothers dearly and think of them every day. We have been beyond blessed with our gifts of life!” – Gennifer & William
“As mother's day approaches, we plan a family activity to do together to celebrate the gift of motherhood. But, as an adoptive family, we are also reminded of how much we owe to another mother in our lives; our son's birth mom. I could not celebrate mother's day without her. We would not be a family without her. My son wouldn't even be alive without her. What am amazing gift! It is something that can't be taken lightly. To all birth moms who sought or are seeking a family for their children, and especially to our birth mom, Tamecka, thank you so much for exhibiting the kind of selflessness and love this world needs.
We are especially thankful Tamecka is someone who will be supportive of our son and open to sharing with him his birth family history. Initially while deciding to adopt, a major concern I had was that a birth mom would try to "steal" their affection away, but I now feel comforted knowing that when Jacob seeks a relationship with Tamecka, she will totally support my motherhood while also being an awesome birth mom herself! Shortly after meeting Tamecka, I soon came to see her as another person to love our son, and, really, we could all use one of those!” – Lindsey & Stephen
“The connection with birth mom, Kelly was divine and something we will treasure and cherish forever.” – Sara & Brian
“I'm so grateful to Xavier’s birth mother for the incredible sacrifice she has made. I cannot imagine my life without this little man.” - Barbara
With both Jessica and Jonathan and their birth mom being just a few hours away from each other and in the same state, they had the extraordinary opportunity to develop a deep relationship with Lucia. Not only were they able to get to know Lucia on so many different levels, they were able to get to know her little boy as well. They enjoyed many outings together. From golfing and swimming to apple picking and magic shows, there was never a lack of laughter and smiles when they were around each other! They of course made sure to gather for meals, eating everyone’s favorite foods! Lucia, Jessica and Jonathan spent so much time also getting to know the precious baby boy that was kicking away in her belly.
This time together allowed them to share so much about their lives and provided love and support that went much farther than their adoption. Knowing that having an open adoption was crucial to Lucia’s adoption plan, being able to spend so much time together allowed them to learn so much about each other and build a strong foundation for their future.
“We had the opportunity to go spend time with our daughter’s birth mom and sisters a few months ago and it was a joy! We didn't know what an open adoption would look like, but we have grown to love her birth mom, Jenn, like she's a part of our family. We spent 5 days together in May and had such a sweet time. We don't know what it will look like over the years, but we're confident that our growing relationship with Jenn and her daughter will be an important part of our family forever.” – Lisa & Bill
“Our hearts constantly felt love and gratefulness for not only our birth mom, but our genuine connection.” – Amber & Jeremy
The stories of love and gratitude for birth mothers are unending. We could never adequately express our appreciation for their courage, but we hope that birth mothers everywhere can take this small gesture as a token of our appreciation.
- Posted on April 13, 2018
- in Everlasting Family Updates
Congratulations to Christy and Adam on finalizing their adoption! With Everlasting Adoption's help and through the strength of their birth mom, they were blessed with their baby boy, Andrew on August 8, 2017. Big brother, John was thrilled to have a little brother! They may have officially become a family after finalization, but love for their son poured from their hearts the moment they met.
- Posted on March 31, 2018
- in Everlasting Birth Announcements
Congratulations to our proud parents, Andy and Peyton who began their journey with Everlasting Adoptions in December of 2016 and welcomed their baby boy 15 short months later! They began communicating with a birth mom who was interested in getting to know them in early September 2017. After some back and forth and with guidance from Everlasting’s staff, it was clear to them that this match was not meant to be. Andy and Peyton were disappointed, but realized situations like this do arise and the right birth mom for them was out there.
Everlasting notified them a few weeks later that another birth mother was interested in getting to know them. Andy and Peyton were thrilled to be matched again so quickly, but they moved forward cautiously optimistic. As with most matches, challenges can arise along the way and Andy, Peyton and birth mom's experience was no different. With the help of Everlasting Adoption’s staff, Andy and Peyton offered support and flexibility to birth mom when she faced uncertainty with her decision. Despite internal anxieties, they remained patient and gave her the space she needed. Their patience paid off and things were quickly back on track.
Andy, Peyton and birth mom's relationship continued to grow and they were even video’d in on the ultrasound revealing the gender of the baby. How thrilled they were to find out it was a baby boy! The time had come for Andy and Peyton to finally meet their baby. Andy left from Texas arriving in Arkansas to prepare for the delivery on March 19th; eagerly awaiting to fill the empty car seat behind him.
Despite experiencing a high risk pregnancy situation, birth mom delivered a healthy baby boy on March 22nd, 2018 at 11:17 am. Andy and Peyton were overjoyed to finally hold their baby boy in their arms. The adoption was officially finalized in Arkansas on March 28th, only 15 short months after signing on with Everlasting Adoptions. The new family made their way home to start their lives together.
Thank you, Andy and Peyton for choosing Everlasting Adoptions to be the ones to guide you through the adoption process. We can’t adequately express our gratitude to birth mother for her courage and decision to give her baby life. Spring brings with it a promise of new beginnings and we look forward to hearing about all the new beginnings Andy, Peyton and baby will share as a family of three.
- Posted on March 23, 2018
- in Everlasting Birth Announcements
Yvonne joined Everlasting Adoptions at the end April of 2017, and just 10 short months later, she is the proud mother of her newborn baby boy, James. In August of 2017, Yvonne was selected by biological parents whose baby was already born and the birth parents were considering adoption because parenting was becoming a struggle and challenge for them. It turned out that this was not the situation meant for Yvonne. The birth parents decided to parent after all. Needless to say, it was an emotional ride for all of us involved. Life has its challenges for sure!
Little did Yvonne know that 2018 was going to come ringing in with the purpose of fulfilling her dream. Yvonne was selected by another birth mother that was giving birth in February and she was so excited!! She flew out to meet the birth mom asap and it was a “meant to be match.”
The rest is history. James was born on February 15, 2018.
Our gratitude goes out to Yvonne! As a single woman she had the confidence and trust in us to make her dream of becoming a parent a reality. Our gratitude and thanks also go out to the birth mother for giving her baby life and for letting us match her with the mother that was meant to raise her baby. Thank you to everyone who helped make this possible!
- Posted on March 15, 2018
- in Resources
After waiting for months and months for a birth mother to show interest in you, you finally receive “the call”. A birth mom likes your profile and wants to get to know you better (in an open or semi-open adoption situation)! In the adoption world, this is called a match. You are overjoyed and begin to imagine all the life experiences you can’t wait to share with a child. It is impossible to not get emotionally invested at this point.
You’ve spoken to the birth mother several times and feel as if you have a great connection with her. The car seat is purchased, the nursery is decorated and the hospital bag is ready. All of a sudden the birth mom stops returning your calls and texts. You don’t want to think the worst, but your adoption facilitator prepares you for a grim reality; this may be a failed match. Your facilitator or attorney finally reach the potential birth mom to learn that she has, in fact, changed her mind and decided to parent. You are heart broken; experiencing grief as devastating as the years of infertility you’ve previously faced.
When adoptive parent(s) are finally matched to a birth mother, there are immense feelings of excitement and a renewed sense of hope. Embrace these feelings and share your excitement, but also be aware that this isn’t the end of the road. An adoption match is not set in stone and can fall through for a variety of reasons. Here are a few reasons an adoption match may fail and some red flags to look out for.
What Are Some Reasons Adoption Matches Fall Through
1. A positive, yet no less devastating reason that an adoption match fails is the birth mother or birth parents decide to parent. When a biological parent chooses to raise their child, it can’t be described as a loss; at least for the birth parent(s). However, it certainly feels like a loss for potential adoptive parents. In some situations, birth mothers find a support system that they may not have initially had. Perhaps the birth father, a grandparent or family member has stepped up to provide emotional and/or financial support. In other circumstances, the birth mother may have sought out counseling and found the strength and support she needed to make a different decision. Regardless, the most important factor to consider is the hope that the child will be raised in a stable home, filled with love.
2. Another reason some adoption matches fail, is less benign. In some cases, a birth parent never had the intention of creating an adoption plan, instead they use their pregnancy or fabricate a pregnancy as a means to obtain money from vulnerable prospective adoptive parents.
Assistance and guidance in avoiding adoption scams are one reason working with an adoption professional can save you time, money and heartache in the long run. An adoption facilitator, like Everlasting Adoptions has years of experience working with birth mothers. They know the red flags to look out for that could indicate a possible fraudulent situation. They also perform some extent of birth mother vetting before matching them with adoptive parents. Nonetheless, adoption scams still happen. Here are a few red flags to look out for when you are matched with a birth mom:
- Avoidance to share personal information, like proof of pregnancy, phone number or address.
- Direct and urgent requests for money.
- Over eager to bond, while knowing little about you.
- Reluctance to speak with your adoption facilitator or attorney.
It is important to be aware that adoption scams do exist, but not to have extreme paranoia regarding every birth parent. Most birth mothers simply want what is best for their babies.
3. As the relationship progresses, either the birth mother or potential adoptive parents decide the match isn’t right for a variety of personal reasons. There are so many factors that are involved in this life changing decision, that it would be impossible to list all of the reasons why a match can fail for personal reasons. It can be difficult to accept when a match fails this way, especially when the other party is not privy to the exact reasons why. Just know that a relationship of this magnitude, that can potentially last a lifetime, needs to be thoroughly considered and both sides should feel 100% confident in their decision.
There are no concrete statistics on what percent of adoption matches fail because it is such a difficult number to obtain. It is important to be aware that these situations do occur, but in no way reflect a failing on the adoptive parents’ part. It is devastating and the loss should be mourned, but it is even more important to not lose hope in the process and that the right birth mother and baby ARE out there.