- Posted on February 22, 2010
- in Everlasting Birth Announcements
~~ WE ARE FOREVER GRATEFUL TO BIRTHMOTHER, ADOPTIVE PARENTS-LAURIE AND JASON AND DIVINE INTERVENTION FOR ANOTHER EVERLASTING DREAM COME TRUE ~~
Laurie and Jason are home safe and sound with their new dream come true. Josiah Caleb was born on 1-29-2010.
Laurie and Jason contracted with Everlasting Adoptions in September of 2007, but in January of 2008, Laurie became pregnant! They had their baby in September of 2008, but still felt a strong desire to build their family through the miracle of adoption. So...
We were able to put their contract to adopt with us on hold until March of 2009 to give them some adjustment time :)
3 months later, in July of 2009, Laurie and Jason were selected by a birthmother AND Josiah was born on January 29, 2010.
Many thanks go out to all of the legal professionals who worked with us to build Laurie and Jason's family through the miracle of adoption!
CONGRATULATIONS AND BLESSINGS ALWAYS!
** The purpose of life. . . . is a life of purpose **
- Posted on February 21, 2010
- in Everlasting Birth Announcements
Dear Everlasting Adoptions,
We cannot thank Carol and her staff enough for all they did to bring our baby boy to us. It is because of Carol and her dedication to helping people find their everlasting families that brought our son home. We started our adoption process in August 2009 and only five months later we were driving to pick him up.
Talking to Carol on the phone was very comforting. Every time a referral came our way and didn’t work out it was heartbreaking and I would doubt our decision of adopting domestically. That is when Carol would say when the right child comes, we will know it and that is exactly what happened. She always knew what to say to make me feel better.
Every time I called Carol she would always answer the phone, night or day, weekday or weekend. The most amazing part of our story was that our son was born in the state we live in and the social worker at the hospital contacted Carol in California and told her that she was the only agency that answered the phone on that Saturday. It was for that reason that our son is now home with us.
When the birthmother signed the papers, Carol was one of the first people I called because I knew she would be as excited as we were to hear the news. I wish I lived closer so I could hug her and thank her for all she did for us.
If I could convince my husband to adopt a third child, I would not think twice about using Everlasting again.
Carol truly is our guardian angel!
Iain, Christine, Christopher, and baby Nicholas
- Posted on February 16, 2010
- in Resources
The First Conversation with a Potential Birthparent
by Nelson Handel
When my wife and I faced our first conversation with an expectant woman considering an adoption plan, we were gripped with bone-numbing fear, which, frankly, confused us.
We were both high-functioning, professional types; it was a phone call. We should be able to handle it smoothly. We'd done our best to prepare, as we would for a business meeting. We had "cheat sheets" from our lawyer, tips from the Internet, a list of concerns and questions. We would be, we hoped, ordered and on-point.
Instead, we stumbled through the call. In the young woman's voice, we could plainly hear the same uncertainty and confusion. We did little that showed our true selves. We never heard from her again.
The personal turned public
Adoption calls upon you to do many things for which you are ill-prepared, like hiring someone to find you a child, or evaluating a potential birthparent's commitment. The common (biological) experience of building a family is a private process, conducted intimately between spouses or partners. In adoption, potential parents are routinely called upon not only to address intimate questions, but to do so in the presence of lawyers and social workers who are complete strangers.
Prospective birthparents find themselves in the same boat. By choosing adoption, they too must publicly confront difficult questions, like "How do I choose the parents of my child?" or "How do I handle parting from my baby?"
Successful open adoptions occur when adoptive parents and birthparents form a strong, pre-placement connection. Despite what may be vast differences in their backgrounds or experience, something clicks and they discover a sense of fit, of rightness together. Yet within the public glare of the adoption process, the real can easily feel fake, and both parties can find themselves in similar zones of discomfort. Precisely at that moment, they are called upon to meet or talk for the first time. How do you find connection within a process that seems to disconnect you from yourself?
The key lies in returning to authentic human communication. Faced with your first conversation with a potential birthparent, what is most important is not some list of questions or negotiating points. What's important is to put the public process of adoption aside and find a way to meet genuinely as people. This is not a job interview; it's more like a date. Your goal is to determine whether you have rapport.
When you meet a potential birthparent, realize that you are encountering someone with a HUGE problem to manage. Treat her as you would any friend with such news. Let your first thoughts be not of your needs and concerns, but of hers. There will be plenty of time later to discuss the "nuts and bolts" of things, like medical history, desire for post-placement relationship, etc. Don't get ahead of yourself. This is about human connection. Focus on what she needs most, and address yourself to those needs. Isn't that the kind of parent you would want, if you could choose?
Ask about the pregnancy: how's it going? Ask her if she likes her doctor, how she's getting to her appointments, what foods she is craving.
Ask about the people in her life. Does she have friends or family she can talk to about what's going on? Your empathy might be just the invitation she needs to unload her thoughts and feelings. The more comfortable and positive you are about adoption, the more you normalize the conversation.
Invite her questions. It's awkward to ask strangers about personal things, especially for younger people. Send a message that you welcome her interest. Answer her questions simply and honestly. Be as open and vulnerable as you would like her to be.
Let the conversation flow without an agenda. In a first meeting, it is less important what you talk about than that you talk, and, most importantly, listen. Remember that, although your biggest fear is that she won't like you, her biggest fear is that you won't like her.
Nothing can fully prepare you for the strangeness of this first meeting. But every day, people negotiate the same waters of a first contact. And every day, through the power of love and authenticity, people find a way past the awkwardness and come together for the sake of a child. You can too.
Nelson Handel is a father by adoption, a journalist, and the author of the book, Reaching Out: The Guide to Writing a Terrific Dear Birthmother Letter.
- Posted on February 15, 2010
- in Adoption in the News
We are all adoptive Moms who work here, 24/7, and we honestly understand the difficult situation you are facing. We can help you decide on which option is best for you. We will never try to convince you either way.
We still talk to our own children's birthparents and treat them with much respect and dignity. We realize they gave us the miracle of life!! ~~~~ There is no greater gift than that. ~~~~
IF you decide on an adoption plan, WE LET YOU SELECT THE PARENTS THAT YOU FEEL ARE RIGHT FOR YOUR BABY. We have many waiting families for you to chose from, and we can help you with your selection IF you would like us to help you.
PLEASE CONSIDER CONTACTING US TODAY by the method you are most comfortable with:
You can fill out an information form on line
Text Message Carol at 630-364-8361
CHAT ONLINE with us right NOW
or call toll free at 1-866-406-2702.
We guide you every step of the way, and we are so EASY to work with.
Get the help you need! Don't wait. We are right here waiting to help you, 24/7!
THANK YOU ! :)
- Posted on February 13, 2010
- in Adoption in the News
We can answer your questions right now! Why not click on GREEN HELP BUTTON on the left, upper side of this page and get your answer now? Why wait??? We want to help you build your family through the miracle of adoption now!
Birthparents, we realize this must be a difficult time for you. We are SO EASY TO TALK TO. We are all adoptive moms ourselves. We talk to our own children's birthparents frequently. We understand! We can help you NOW. Don't wait; let us guide you through the adoption process every step of the way OR just talk about your options. WE WILL NEVER try to sway your decision either way.
CLICK THE LINK AT THE TOP TO CHAT WITH ME NOW :) I'm RIGHT HERE WAITING FOR YOU.